龍卷風

狂風掃葉 葉落歸根

拍戲

Posted by doc on October 20, 2020

男人:“我是來自 Astro 的,想租你的藥房一天來拍攝一個節目。不知道你方便租給我們嗎?”

醫生:“啊,可以是可以,不過我有個條件。”

男人:“什麼條件?”

醫生:“我要做男主角,而且要有超能力那種。”

男人:“對不起,打擾了。”

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量體溫

Posted by doc on October 6, 2020

病人:那天我喉嚨痛看了你,吃了藥後,今天好了。不過總覺得身體好像有點熱。你幫我量下體溫看看。

醫生:現在量體溫還要特地來找我?

病人:不然?

醫生:你找一條街,每間店都跑進去量體溫就可以了。跑它個十多二十間,直到有一間量到你發燒就可以了。

病人:不過他們的都不準的咯!

醫生:脫褲子。趴下。屁股翹起來!

病人:幹嘛?

醫生:肛溫。超準!

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Ribut Petir

Posted by doc on September 21, 2020

Ribut petir `serang’ Malaysia malam ini!

Rkaru : Goodie! Been meaning to weather-test my new tent. I think I’ll set it up and test the rain-proofiness.

Tonight in a durian farm somewhere in Raub…

Scrappy : *woof woof… grrr…

Picture
Scrappy

Kai Hong : ‘Sup, Scrappy?

Scrappy : *woof woof… grrr…

Kai Hong : *yawn… Okay okay, let me get my lastik and have a look…

Rkaru : Ouch ouch ouch…

Kai Hong : Oh, it’s you, Rkaru, what brought you here in the middle of the night? You have my durians sticking all over your behind!

Rkaru : Dunno man… I was setting up my tent and suddenly I thought my RIS/TC machine went bonkers again…

Kai Hong : Is that a hang-glider behind you?

Rkaru : No. That was the tent I was supposed to be testing just now.

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XM4

Posted by doc on August 11, 2020

RPCN: Last time someone say dun want wireless…

Doc: My Note 10+ dun hv headphone hole ma… T_T

RPCN: hahahahahahahahahahahahhaah. this is a joke.

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Side Income

Posted by doc on August 4, 2020

Patient: Doc, I heard that I can pay my utility bills here at your clinic.

Dr Liew: That’s right. Maxis, Syabas, Unifi, Astro, all can. Did you bring the bill?

Patient: This is my Maxis bill. I pay you in cash.

Dr Liew: Sure. Can can can. *pay bill online with Boost* Done!

Patient: Thank you.

Dr Liew: No problem.

Patient: Bye.

Dr Liew: Bye. *shake shake shake phone for Boost coins* Wah! Fatt Datt!

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Indirect Vegetarian

Posted by doc on August 4, 2020

Friend: I am vegetarian.

Dr Liew: I am indirect vegetarian. I eat vegetarians for breakfast.

Friend: Huh? You eat human?

Dr Liew: Cow is vegetarian. I eat cow. I am indirect vegetarian.

Friend: *sighhhhh* 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

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沒毛媽媽

Posted by doc on August 4, 2020

誰的媽媽身上一條毛都沒有?

猜一古代名人。

答案:孟母 in cantonese sounds like 掹毛 (拔毛)。🤣

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17 years

Posted by doc on August 4, 2020

It has been 17 years since I have created this domain of mine – drliew.net

Thanks to Paul Tan, the Malaysian Car God.

For the time being, my blog will reside at drliew.wordpress.com and my URL drliew.net will redirect here. Not so canggih, I know. But it serves its purpose for the time being.

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快樂

Posted by doc on July 31, 2020

一年四次郎:什麼是快樂?

醫生:可以建築在別人的痛苦上的,就是快樂。

魷魚:怎麼說?

醫生:你難道沒有看日本的小電影嗎?你看那些日本女優,表情多麼的痛苦。她們的男人,肯定很快樂。

大粒癦:我比較喜歡西方的。那些表情,看起來比較享受。叫聲也比較銷魂。

醫生:那麼那些紅毛鬼男優,必定很痛苦。

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Doctor I am hungry

Posted by doc on November 7, 2019

Patient: Doctor, I am hungry.

Doctor: Go eat something.

Patient: I mean I felt hungry yesterday night when I was sleeping.

Doctor: Then get up and eat something.

Patient: What do you suggest I eat?

Doctor: A seven-course meal would be nice.

Patient: Can it be my stomach has too many acid?

Doctor: …

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